Finding Self PT 10 (Watch Me Flow)

      After the injury everything changed. Being laid up like that with no help. I had to hobble to the market only to be ran over by crowds of people that I couldn't keep up with. Being left by the Lyft because the driver couldn't figure out how to come around the corner. Just feeling helpless, abandoned and stranded. Feelings like this will put things in a different perspective really fast. Some people out there have major support and people around to help when things get tough and some people simply just don't. For me I'm one of the one's that don't but I find that strangers are always kinder to me than my own family who is by society's standards supposed to be our first safety net & supporters. 

     N-E-how being laid up like that and alone I had more uninterrupted time to think than I ever did in my life. Self reflection questions that I never even thought of started to pop into my mind. The first one was career wise. The question was do you even like what you're doing for work? Answer: I don't even know n-e-more. Do you even want to work in social work or with youth right now? No because my heart and mind aren't in it at this time. Why not? Me being honest with myself changed everything. The answer was; when I was in my dark space I had something to prove to my world. I felt like I had to prove that I wasn't a lost cause or a caught out there addict, I felt like I had to prove that I was worth something. But to who tho, I found out later, I was just trying to prove that I was better than everyone was saying that I was at the time. More than anything I was trying to prove to myself that I can take care of things in life correctly; since so many things were taken from me. 

        I'm so glad that during that laid up injury I figured out I don't have to prove anything to anyone and whatever I was actually trying to prove to myself I proved. I surprised the hell out of myself with some of the amazing work I was able to do being in social work for so long. I also learned many things that I apply to my life now that help me to just keep going. On to what I'm doing now... I am an upcoming Author, I've published 3 starter short stories on Kindle. 1. https://www.amazon.com/Trapped-inside-her-mind-What-ebook/dp/B09Q4V7CYF  2. https://www.amazon.com/Grandmas-Words-Have-Power-ebook/dp/B0CYB3QWGP  3. https://www.amazon.com/Only-Hood-these-things-happen-ebook/dp/B0D37V1DPP.  Now I'm not exactly proud of the way I put theses books together it was my first try. I love the stories but I've gotten better with my book format. I also published a book called the SEX INSTINCT on LuLu's platform. I'm very excited about this book but I can see where I still have some growing to do https://www.lulu.com/search?page=1&sortBy=RELEVANCE&q=Jodie+Spartz&pageSize=10&adult_audience_rating=

    I've gotten myself into storytelling in front of an audience too! I've done it before many years ago in Philadelphia PA. At this club called Le'Tage it was on South St. The organization was Story Slam. The club didn't make it through the pandemic unfortunately and is now closed. That was over 10years ago and life had to hang me out to dry for me to get back to what I truly love, WRITING!  So as soon as I was able to walk comfortably again in September I joined the Chestnut Story tellers at Pete's Candy Store in Brooklyn https://www.petescandystore.com/ When I came off that stage I felt HIGH, I felt like I found my calling! My new Career the thing I want to do for the rest of my life. I've done three so far and am hype to go to any writing events, open Mic's, book signing's and whatever else is out there for me to discover on my writing journey. 

     I am still a cleaning lady for financial support and am thinking about going into Hospitality next. I've also found myself having fun going to daytime TV shows and being apart of studio audiences. I've been to Steve Wliko's that was in 2018 https://stevewilkos.com/, Drew Barrymore 2025 https://www.thedrewbarrymoreshow.com/  and Tamron Hall 2025 https://tamronhallshow.com/. This coming Monday I will be on the Sherri Shepherd show, so mad I wasn't able to see Wendy Williams. Later in the month I will be on the View and next month is Steve Colbert. I can't wait until I'm actually a guest on one or more of these shows! Watch me flow!!! Thank you for following me this far I can't wait for you to read more of my stories and I hope your excited for this upcoming memoir, it's my diary from the time I was 19 until 25 and the rest will be following it and the future is still being written. A special Thank You to the BKLN ART HAUS for hosting SHUT-UP & WRITE so I could get this blog post done, you guys are amazing and your Haus is super dope! https://www.bkarthaus.com/ If your ever in NYC make sure you visit!