Remember book reports when we were in school? For some they were a dreaded terrible thing, for others they were fun ways to recall your favorite book and an easy format to tell someone what the book was about. I've decided to post some reports of books I've read recently; let's jump right in.
I came across this book in ChinaTown Queens NYC. I was on my way to the 7 train and this man was selling books on the street. I started to look because I can't deny a good book sale. I was attracted to this book mostly because of the title. The man said that he would give me the book for $3 but I only had $1 in cash and he didn't have cash-app. He was nice enough to give it to me for the buck.
Author: Nina LaCour
Title: We Are Okay
Main Characters: Marin & her Gramps, Mabel & her parents
Setting: A Upstate NY college campus & San Francisco California Flashbacks
Plot: This story is about a grief stricken young woman & her emotional response to life's changes. Marin was juggling college and trying to find her way after experiencing loss in two different situations that took a toll on her mental health and caused chaos in her world.
Personal Endorsement: I related to this book on so many levels. Grief looks different for everyone but it still transpires into pain. There are a couple statements that stood out to me that I will share with you. There was a quote that said "Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can." I can repeat that to myself, it made me remember that I forgive myself mostly because I did the best I could with the knowledge I had.
The second part that touched my soul was when Marin said that she couldn't fathom boarding a plane to San Francisco. She said it would be flying into ruins. Even the good places are haunted. I totally could relate to that feeling. If you've been keeping up with my journey you know that I feel like that about Philadelphia but I have visited because I didn't have the heart to just drop off the face of the earth on my love ones. Marin did tho and I admire and respect her for it.
The next thing was when she said "I know there's a difference between how I used to understand things and how I do now. I used to cry over a story and then close the book, and it all would be over. Now everything resonates, sticks like a splinter festers." Understood! This was deep too; despite the sweetness of the news, loneliness, bottom-less and black, rushes in. I felt that because it doesn't matter what happens when your crushed. You feel like your world is over and happiness will never revel itself. When Marin said that she's trying to stay here with her in her happiness. It spoke to me about staying in the present moment.
Then she started talking about denial. "It turns out that even the fiercest denial can't stop time." "The trouble with denial is that when the truth comes, you aren't ready." Both felt!! Next piece she stated, if we have any sense of self-preservation, we do the best with what we're given. I feel like that is true on so many levels. Let's go further inside of Marin's mind she said; I was afraid of my loneliness. And how I'd been tricked and the way I convinced myself of so much; that I wasn't sad, that I wasn't alone.
I was afraid of the man who I'd loved, and how he had been a stranger. I was afraid of how I hated him. How I wanted him back. I was afraid of the lies I'd told myself. The lies he'd told me. This was how I was feeling about my husband at the time. She wasn't even talking about a man romantically and it still related to my situation. Right now we're imagining the same thing too. She said; I try to imagine a future apartment. My own kitchen with decorations on the wall. Me too girl, me too.
Marin stated here how grief can cause emotions to go in circles, I was okay just a moment ago. I will learn how to be okay again. I Also agree here where she stated that; there are degrees of obsession, of awareness, of grief, of insanity. I can't deny this statement either; "Tragedy, Heartbreak and Betrayal; these are things that change a person. If we endure them and we aren't changed, then something is wrong. I enjoyed reading this book and would recommend to anyone that is feeling the need just to feel ok.
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